Hate Mail

My bf and I received a hate mail from an anonymous person. She lives by the name hddn_idntty. I have a feeling she's a girl. She said something like I will never be happy with the relationship I have with my boyfriend. I assumed she is one my boyfriend's Xs. Why would she stop two people from loving each other? I don't really mind coz i know she is just sour graping. poor her. In fact, she makes me feel important, like a celebrity hehehe. I can give her my autograph if she wants to. lol. whatever she said does not really matter. I am not going to sit here and wallow in emotions. Because something good is gonna happen today. ;)

That's it for now. I leave you with this pic that i like most.

High Hopes

I'm thinking of the things I want to do sometime soon. If I can't do what I have planned, I'm not only going to be upset, but i'm going to feel really dumb, too. It really is the worst when you have huge high hopes for something you've been planning for what seems like forever, and when the time comes when you can finally get it done, the key things are missing and you don't know if you can even get it done at all. *sigh*

Anyways, I've been eyeing on the the Nokia 5300. It's a music phone, that has 1 gig memory, can hold tons of music pic and movies. That's all i care anyway, te-he. Well..i don't really need a new phone though.So I asked my bf's opinion and i don't think he likes my idea of getting a new phone. Phhbbt!

Monday was a good day!

It's a holiday! No work, so I met up with my boyfriend at Robinson's..and since it was crowded that we can hardly breathe we've decided to go at SM City, then we ate at Sbarro and leisurely walk around the mall just to kill the time. And by 5pm we went to the Sport Complex because he plays basketball. And oh..he got me a box of Krispy Cremes and a cutie red pillow!


And.. I've decided to diet. Not in the sense that I'll eat solely rabbit food and count carbs, but I'll definitely start watching what I eat.

An interesting, and oh-so-true feeling..hehe!

Waaaahhh! I may be over re-acting but I'm missing him. The laughing, the kissing, the sharing, the cuddling, the general chit-chat, the love-making, the whispering, the smirking, the caressing, the showering, the undressing, the dressing, the undressing an hour later, the adoring stares, the warmth, the giggling, the agreeing, the disagreeing, the hand-holding, the sheet-twisting, the fall-asleep, the wake-up, the thinking ahead, the desire for time without end, the everything.

Hah. But i'll make sure we'll have a wresting match when he comes back. Hahaha! :p

It's our 2nd monthsary!

He just called. I am super happy. So I must celebrate with a post. He's still in Manila, but it's still ok..we are just gonna celebrate when he comes back on sunday or monday. ;)

We have more kisses and love to look forward to in the future.

Quick Rundown

My big guy is in Manila right now for his visa interview tomorrow. Arrghhh.. I miss him already.

Things are really rad right now, and I love everything. Hopefully I don't jinx my good luck by writing this. te-he!

*happy dance*

Frustrated!

My boyfriend is acting a bit different today. I just don't know why. He's not talking about it. And if I ask, he would say he's fine..things are alright even thought it's not. It's kinda bothering me. I don't want to be upset for no reason..but I'm going to be dumb. All is weird, and I don't like it. :(

And......

Some people are just fucknuts ! *frowns*

I’m just not interested in partaking in negativity anymore. I don’t want to be weighed down by any of it. I don’t care about any of the bullshit that anyone has to spew and I am not going to let it affect me..(or my relationship with my boyfriend). I’m going to live my own life my own way. I’m feeling really good about where/what I am right now. I may not have everything I want and I most definitely still struggle and have problems, but I’m okay. I feel like I can handle anything. I think I’ll be fine after all. Really.

Things are a bit frustrating right now, because many things are in a state of limbo!
Also, it’s frustrating that I’m gaining an unflattering amount of weight and I really don’t like it. My diet hasn’t changed. Neither has my lifestyle at all, really. I was never a very active person to begin with, but it’s gotten to the point where I won’t wear my fave shirts because of how chubby I am now. I miss my flat tummy. I miss being able to fit comfortably in my jeans. I do need to eat healthier though. I would go for a jog but the area where i live is kind of….really bad. So scratch that. My boyfriend also recommends that we should visit the gym. Ehehe. Sweeeeeettt! But I don’t think I have time for that.. so scratch that as well.

Pissed off!

So i’m in a fucking BAD MOOD.Tomorrow better go well or i’m gonna choke a bitch. Some people really pissed me off.

Damn assholes. Please stop wasting my fucking time. It’s too precious to spend making an effort with people who don’t or won’t appreciate me. I’ve been disrespected by one person, lied to, blown off and generally treated like i don’t matter way too often in the past little while. What happened to me before won’t happen again this time. So either step up or shut up. I don’t have time for this shit.

I hate situations where I really and truly do not know what to do. There is no right answer. What I want and what I can have are two different things.

Things slip through my fingers before i even know they are falling. Sometimes the path to self-destruction is clear..sometimes i find myself already there, blinking and foggy, sadness clinging to me like a bad hangover. Perhaps I was born without the necessary social skills to convey my real personality and intentions. I wish I had the brain power to be amusing or at least entertaining…Perhaps I’m right, and really have nothing to say.

DAmnit..so many conflicting emotions… i don’t know what to do.

Blog blog blog!

When a person has decided to be mute for so long it is not always easy to make a sound come out. But suddenly here I am creating a blog on here for the first time. Those who've been around a while know this is a strange thing. The simplest explanation is that from the beginning I never wanted to be considered famous hehehe, i wanted it to be for something unique and intelligent and personal that i DID or created.

I thought if i let myself get really involved in this, it might make me wonder someday whether or not any success I may have was coming from a source that I wanted it to come from. Now i see it a little differently, it seems that by not keeping a blog i am sending out "just an image" even more! Hah! At least if you are going to be known, its nice to be known a bit more for who you are, i think.So hello, I am Marie. I've already put a bunch of my interests in neat little Friendster, http://www.friendster.com/sinofsorrow .

Like i said I'm not so sure how to go about expressing myself to the world, but I love to write, so eventually, hopefully, it will fall into place. I also keep a blog on that site.

Ecstacy of the day so far: Woke up smiling thinking of the wonderful weekend i had with my boyfriend.

Shit of the day: I'm still trying to organize my thoughts on how to finally update my website. lol. I haven't updated my site for almost 2 years now. Dang!